Ghosting: The Unpleasant Reality

 

Nothing will snap you out of a honeymoon phase quicker than a *read 10 hours ago*, or in dating terms, being ghosted. Suddenly the life you've imagined in your head with the person you met 2 weeks ago is nothing more than a humiliating habit of wishful thinking. 

 

The act of being ghosted typically falls into one of two categories; the slow burn or the quick chop. Neither is better or less hurtful than the other and they both result in the same outcome, asking ourselves as we stare into our reflection on our phone screen “am i being ghosted?” 

        The Slow Burn 

Being ghosted through the slow burn is like putting a quarter into an arcade crane machine just for it to come up empty every time. You’ll respond with hope and excitement of a connection, but in the end you’ll leave the situation feeling drained and embarrassed. 

 

The slow burn ghoster will intentionally show less and less interest until the conversation dies out. This tactic makes the ghosting less obvious which is why it often leaves you wondering if you are truly being ghosted. 

 

The best thing to do in this case is to relay your feelings or concerns to your partner, giving them the opportunity to be honest about their intentions. 

        The Quick Chop

 The quick chop is an explicit, complete cut off of communication. It can be completely unexpected and without a clear cause, making it all the harder to understand. In the initial aftermath of this type of ghosting, you may trick yourself into thinking maybe they were busy and forgot to respond, maybe their phone died, or maybe they were abducted by aliens because why would they not answer? 

 

These options are all valid, however in most cases the quick chop was an easy way out and doesn’t require facing any consequences or explanations, making it very popular amongst ghosters. 

 

In this situation, the best course of action is to heal and move on. While that is easier said than done, rereading your conversations or wondering what went wrong does not change their mind and will only hold you back from finding your true connection. 

       Uncover The Truth

To escape the cycle of suspicions and questioning, SciMatch’s “Am I Being Ghosted” feature will uncover the truth in your relationship. Using AI to analyze your text messages, SciMatch will identify any signs of ghosting so you can have clarity and stop staring into your phone screen with wonder.